Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?

Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?

Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

Why is abbreviated such a long word?

Why is a boxing ring square?

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

The Little House Out Back
    "No Smoking Please"

One of  my bygone recollections,
As I recall the days of yore
Is the little house, behind the house,
With the crescent over the door.
'Twas a place to sit and ponder
With your head bowed down low.
Knowing that you wouldn't be there,
If you didn't have to go.

Ours was a three-holler,
With a size for everyone.
You left there feeling better,
After your usual job was done.
You had to make these frequent trips,
Whether snow, rain, sleet, or fog-
To the little house where you usually
Found the Sears-Roebuck catalog.

Oft times in dead of winter,
The seat was covered with snow.
Twas then with much reluctance,
To the little house you'd go.
With a swish you'd clear the seat,
Bend low, with dreadful fear
You'd blink your eyes and grit your teeth
As you settled on your rear.

I recall the day Granddad,
Who stayed with us one summer,
Made a trip to the shanty
Which proved to be a hummer.
'Twas the same day my Dad
Finished painting the kitchen green.
He'd just cleaned up the mess he made
With rags and gasoline.

He tossed the rags in the shanty hole
And went on his ususal way
Not knowing that by doing so
He would eventually rue the day.
Now Granddad had an urgent call,
I never will forget,
This trip he made to the little house
Lingers in my memory yet.

He sat down on the shanty seat,
With both feet on the floor.
Then filled his pipe with tobacco
And struck a match on the outhouse door.
After the tobacco gegan to glow,
He slowly raised his rear,
Tossed the flaming match in the open hole
With not a sign of fear.

The Blast that followed, I am sure
Was heard for miles around;
And there was porr ol' Granddad
Just sitting on the ground.
The smoldering pipe was still in his mouth,
His suspenders he held tight,
The celebrated three-holler
Was blown clear out of sight.

When we asked him what had happened,
His answer I'll never forget.
He thought it must be something
That he had recently et!
Next day we had a new one
Which my Dad built with ease.
With a sign on the entrance door
Which read: No Smoking, Please.

Now that;s the ed of the story,
With memories of long ago,
Of the little house, behind the house
Where we went couse we had to go!